tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394542802435937200.post4692203532773377051..comments2010-11-10T10:22:33.113-06:00Comments on Ask Aunt Messy: A New Letter! (How Exciting!)Aunt Messyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07424781871244170075noreply@blogger.comBlogger4125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394542802435937200.post-51678118642783048432009-11-02T11:36:03.073-06:002009-11-02T11:36:03.073-06:00Oh yeah, I missed the part about him being single ...Oh yeah, I missed the part about him being single for that long. There's a reason for that ~ probably several. And none of them good.Mermaidhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17583754215885030959noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394542802435937200.post-14419763087705051982009-11-02T07:47:01.828-06:002009-11-02T07:47:01.828-06:00I agree with the age thing to a point. There are a...I agree with the age thing to a point. There are always exceptions. My spider sense would be tingling all over the place once I found out the guy had been single for 18 years. <br /><br />THAT is a real problem. Believe me, if someone WANTS to be in a relationship but hasn't been for that long, then there is something epically wrong there. Most of the men (and women!) who whine that they "can't meet anyone" or "I only meet creeps" are either fishing in the wrong pond or have real.....issues.Aunt Messyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07424781871244170075noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394542802435937200.post-18245654221149778312009-11-01T22:11:38.570-06:002009-11-01T22:11:38.570-06:00The LW should have listened to her gut instinct th...The LW should have listened to her gut instinct the first time the man "snapped at her child" and the child "never really warmed to him." That would have been the end for me.<br /><br />I'd have to agree with CoolOne about not involving the child with the men she's dating until it's become serious. I know a lot of women will say that there's no point to date any further unless he gets along with the kids and vice versa, so they want to introduce them, but then they will turn right around and ignore it when the child and the man don't warm to each other. I'm not speaking specifically about the lady here, just making a general observation.<br /><br />It's also been my observation that a lot of older men genuinely do like children but it's the "like" that a grandparent has ~ they think the kids are cute in small doses but they want to be able to hand them back to someone when they grow tiresome. I think this lady may be dating men a wee bit too old for her purposes.Mermaidhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17583754215885030959noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394542802435937200.post-53953218750217427172009-10-31T19:57:40.336-05:002009-10-31T19:57:40.336-05:00Excellent advice, Aunt Messy. I might only add tha...Excellent advice, Aunt Messy. I might only add that widowers often make the best partners, since their marriages did not end by choice, and the ones who had truly good relationships are often eager for another good relationship. <br /><br />That, and it's a good idea not to involve your small child with the new men in your life until the relation starts to take a serious turn. Even introducing his as "Mr. Dave, who is a friend of Mommy's" can confuse them, because Mr. Dave will no longer be coming around if it doesn't work out.CoolOnehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12220187158350943016noreply@blogger.com